Ohio

Ok, let’s see…I believe that the last time we wrote a blog entry we were fighting a losing battle against the state of West Virginia and praying for flat land and a change of scenery. Thankfully, West Virginia finally did let us escape into the safe harbor of Ohio but it did not let go with out a fight.

After a refreshing hotel stay in Grafton West Virginia on Wednesday, May 23 we were hoping to be able to bike into Ohio by Friday. However, on Friday we hit a malicious stretch of route 50 abundant with debris that left us with not two, but three flat tires to fix. By the time we were rolling again it was obvious that we would be spending one more night in the state that we have grown to love. Saturday morning we awoke with less than 20 miles standing between us and our forth state in two weeks, however, before we could commence our journey Zach noticed that he had yet another flat tire. This time however, we were out of tubes and out of luck. After failing to patch the punctured tubes, Anthony and Ryan road into Parkersburg, West Virginia’s border town to Ohio, to find a bike shop while Zach planned to walk the last 10 miles into town. Luckily, not only did we find a magnificent bike shop, but Zach also was picked up by a sympathetic fellow cycler with an element and a bike rack, who brought him to Bob’s Bike Shop to meet the other two members. Bob’s bike shop ended up being one of the best stops we made thus far on the trip. The owner/operator of the shop was a man named Kenny and he not only hooked us up with spare tubes and other bike care necessities, but he spent all day tuning our bikes and only charged us for one of them!! We also ran into several bikers who showered us with advice and best wishes. Morale of the story is: if you ever end up in Parkersburg, West Virginia on a bike and need something, Bob’s Bike Shop is the place to go.

After Bob’s we finally crossed into Ohio where a pleasant surprise awaited us. As we were riding into Athens Ohio, Ryan got a phone call from friends of the family saying that they too were in Athens and would like to see us. These friends were Aaron, Becky, Mike, and Fi and they just so happened to be in Athens on a Memorial Day motorcycle ride to Missouri. The greeting that they gave us far surpassed anything that we could have expected. As we took the exit to Athens we were stopped by the four bikers where they proceeded to give us a hero’s escort into the town with one Harley in front of us and the other three following. We felt as though we were part of a Hell’s Angels entourage!! If that wasn’t enough, they put us up in a hotel for the evening and treated us to dinner. It was a great way to end a day that started out with a few flat tires and a 10 mile walk.

The beginning of Ohio was not quite as flat as we hoped but the goodwill that we have been met with throughout this state has more than made up for the hilly ride. Aside from Bob’s bike shop and being treated like kings in Athens, Anthony’s parents met up with us in a small town in the middle of Ohio in what turned out to be an interesting evening that included a meal, a few drinks in the only restaurant in town, and Anthony being hit on by a lady thrice as old as his mom while his mom was sitting next to him. Anthony still has sweet Jolinda’s number but has not built up the courage to call and set up a date. Later, as we were leaving the restaurant at around 11pm we were still without a place to stay until a complete stranger over heard us talking. His name was John Soarde and he led us back to his parent’s place where we were given a nice flat piece of grass to camp on. Even better than the quiet camping spot for the evening was the surprise that we received in the morning. Mr. and Mrs. Soarde invited us in for an eggs, toast, and fruit breakfast. They also opened their home for us to wash up and fill up our waters. After filling up on Soardes hospitality we packed our gear, thanked our generous hosts, said goodbye to Sam (the family dog), and went back on the road with full stomachs.

This puts us in Cincinnati, where a friend of Anthony’s brother Joe was nice enough to offer both his apartment and his car to the team, as we took a much needed day off the road. We finally rolled into his uncle’s place yesterday evening after yet another flat tire. The final stretch of road in Ohio had a few lessons left to teach us. The first of which was our initial choice in equipment, specifically our choices in tires and seats was perhaps a tad premature. Now having spent almost two entire day’s worth of riding time changing and patching tubes we decided it was time to buy some more heavy duty tires for the remainder of the journey. The second lesson was that our choice in seats proved just a little too tough for our virgin butts. We’ll spare you the wearing, stinging, abrasive details, but the amount of chaffing inspired a new choice in seats as well. The following day at a bike shop was concluded with a three gloriously squishy gel seats, and six bad ass new tires that more closely resemble tank treds than their streamlined predecessors. Team LOCO has gotten a serious upgrade.

We will cross the Ohio/Kentucky border in about a half hour and are looking forward to getting back on the road. The tentative schedule for the next week or so is to stay on rt 50 until we hit St Louis. The goal is to knock out two states in less than a week, and from where we sit we have about 350 miles to go until we get to “The Gateway to the West. So if any of you readers feel like paying us a visit, you know where to find us. And with that, we will bid you a brief farewell…

But not before we introduce a new segment to these little misadventures called: Anthony’s Awkward Situation Corner. In this segment we will relate some of the more amusing aspects of a cross country bicycle race that one may not anticipate.

Please take a moment and imagine a quiet, calm nature scene. A river whispers to the trees as it runs along its ancient path. The morning sun shines through the leaves and reflects across quiet ripples of water onto a bed of grass and stone. A small, three man tent is set up just beyond the water’s edge, inside of which sleeps Anthony, one of three cyclers on their way across United States.

He lays on his back, his eyes gently moving back and forth as he enjoys a dream of Jessica Biel telling him how amazing she thinks he and his bicycle trip are. She’s so impressed she’d like to offer up her home to the team. She goes one step further, she invites him out to dinner. Anthony is elated. She comes in closer, and reaches out her arms to give him a hug. Unconsciously a smile spreads across his face. Her hands pass by his head and Anthony’s excitement soars as he passes the boundaries of personal space.

Then, just as her arms lace around the back of his neck… Anthony is wrenched back to consciousness by a heavy thud on his chest. He looks down and is not met by the slender work of female perfection he was enjoying just seconds ago, oh no. His eyes snap open and he is horrified to behold an appendage that more closely resembles the flank of beef than an arm. He follows it north and looks left where not two inches from his face is the very long, round, huge chinned face of Zach snoring with such force that the walls of the tent seem to shake with the taking of breath. And when he exhales the product of his mouth’s entire nights work culminates in the bellow of morning dragons breath as it washes over his face. Anthony can utter but a single, sad, stupefied syllable. “NNNGYAAAA???!~!!”

Take it easy peeps, we’ll update soon. And oh, if you’re bored feel free to check out the “I’m out of west Virginia” video, and the Jolinda three way kiss. J Here are the respective links:

I’m out of west Virginia dance:

http://good-times.webshots.com/video/3022483710101327493VZTAyU

Jolinda 3 way:

http://good-times.webshots.com/video/3063713840101327493HRgkAS